Little Johnny Jokes

[IcePrincess625]

<div class="Section1"> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none"><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">A young female teacher was giving an assignment to her 6th Grade class. It was a large assignment so she started writing high up on the chalkboard. Suddenly there was a giggle from one of the boys in the class.></font><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial; mso-color-alt: windowtext">?></font> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none"><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial; mso-color-alt: windowtext">></font><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">></font><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">She quickly turned and asked, "What's so funny Michael?"></font> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none"><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">></font><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">"Well teacher, I just saw one of your garters."></font> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none"><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">></font><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">"Get out of my classroom," she yells, "I don't want to see you for two days."></font> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none"><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">></font><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">The teacher turns back to the chalkboard. Realizing she had forgotten to title the assignment; she reaches to the very top of the chalkboard.></font> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none"><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">></font><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">Suddenly there is an even louder giggle from another male student. She quickly turns and asks,></font> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none"><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">></font><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">"What's so funny Tommy?"></font> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none"><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">></font><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">"Well miss, I just saw both of your garters."></font> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none"><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">></font><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">Again she yells, "Get out of my classroom!" This time the punishment is more severe, "I don't want to see you for two weeks."></font> <p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-layout-grid-align: none"><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">></font><font face="Arial" color="black" size="2"><span style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; COLOR: black; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">Embarrassed and frustrat

[Anonymous]

a visibly shaken little johnny shows up tardy for class one morning

his teacher asks the reason for his tardiness and his being so upset

"as i was leaving for school my dogs ran out of the house into the road and big truck hit 'em in the ass"

"rectum" corrects his teacher

"rectum hell, killed both them sonofabitches"

[Anonymous]

little johnny goes to the druggist to buy condoms for his date with sally

he places the condoms on the counter and the clerk tells him "that'll be $5.35"

"$5.35?!?" says little johnny, puzzled,"the price tag says $5.00"

"the $.35 is for the tax" replies the clerk

"shit--you can keep the tacks--i'll tie 'em on"